I was raised by my mother in a single parent home. She was, and still is, a “career woman” who provided for us to the point where I never in my life have felt unstable. As a teenager, many of my friends were also from divorced homes, and it all felt pretty normal. Truthfully, what felt awkward was a happily married couple taking active rolls in their children’s daily activities. As a slightly jaded and independent young man I typically did not prefer this scenario.

Looking back though, I realize that perhaps the real reason that I felt uncomfortable in these situations was the presence of the father. There was very little older male influence for me growing up and I noticed that with this influence came a whole new set of rules that I was not used to and did not like. Even my own father, whom I love and respect very much, was not one to impose his discipline on me.

My home life was a lesson in feminine culture. Nurturing, beautiful, and creative, even my mother’s career was an example of how feminine cultures place less emphasis on gender roles (Floyd 51). The problem lay in that my families’ values were not and are not the norm in the rest of society. I am not claiming that this is a problem for society necessarily, but it was a problem for me growing up and trying to socialize.

The masculine home had more order. There were more valuables you couldn’t touch, more rules to the games you played, more supervision, the wife often didn’t work, and the father was often a somewhat aloof figurehead, all correlating with a traditionally more achievement based masculine culture (Floyd 51).

I do not disagree with the values of a more traditionally masculine way of life. I know that the boundaries are there for our protection and that the competitiveness is designed to help us achieve. However, I still have to make a conscious effort in adapting to such an environment. It is my hope that when it comes time to raise my own family my wife and I will be able to encourage the positives of both masculine and feminine culture and produce a child that is comfortable in either.


Floyd, Kory. "Culture and Gender." Interpersonal Communication: The Whole Story. Ed. Nina Meyer. USA: McGraw-Hill, 2010. 51-52. Print.

My First Communications Course

Interpersonal Communication is my first Communications course and I am already intrigued. It always amazes me when I first approach the study of a subject how my initial feelings toward it, derived from practical experience, contrast with the science and actuality of it. I suppose deep down I see myself as a smart person but as soon as I step into a new field of knowledge that has been studied and broken down by those that have made it their life’s work to do so, all my preconceptions fall apart. At this point I am left confused as to why my beliefs were so far off and eager to learn more.

Already from my first readings I feel this way. My ego has been deflated and I lay at the feet of the subject’s initial blow wondering where I am and how I find my way back to feeling smart. It seems odd to me that a subject as basic as communication between people could be so deeply studied as a science and its parameters so well defined. It almost makes me angry that professionals are lurking about studying my interactions with friends, family members, and everyone else, formulaically deciphering my actions. And why are they there? So that they know exactly what buttons to push when they are trying to sell me the latest and greatest whatever? Or is the answer more pure… Does the Communications Scientist seek to understand me so that they may better understand themselves and the entire human condition? This is my hope and the basis of what I aspire to take away from this course.

I would like to become a better communicator. I would like to be a better listener, a better interpreter, and a better presenter, and I believe that by having a more intimate understanding of how this process functions I may become so. In preparing my admissions application to NCSU I began to realize how important it was that every word I wrote convey my feelings accurately. The responses had to be only fifty words and I found myself cutting back in order to make two words convey the same idea as a sentence had before; And I liked it. I liked that I was being so specific and that there were perfect words for the feelings that I wanted to express and that all I had to do was work a little harder and that they would present themselves. I felt sharper. It was as though my ability to present myself accurately created clarity in my own mind. My expression was a path to self-discovery.

The major I listed on my application was Communications Media. I am an audiovisual technician with a background in music, art, and production. I was not accepted as a degree student but I still plan to be. This class is the basis of my future major and I intend to envelop every aspect of it in order to set myself up for success in my future studies. It is a personal interest as well as an academic and a professional one. I am enthralled to be a part of this learning experience and have a chance to absorb my classmates' ideas while in turn portraying my own thoughts on the topics to be presented. I appreciate this opportunity and I thank you for listening.