Perceiving Conflict

In his chapter on conflict, Floyd presents us with a list of ways in which conflict is often thought of. Some of his examples include a game, a struggle, a dance, and a war. When I read this I immediately asked myself, how do I perceive conflict and how should I perceive it. The answer to my first question wasn’t very positive. I determined that I perceived conflict as a struggle and an attack. I take it personally and I do not easily change my position. Obviously, that is not an appropriate way to behave in situations I will partake in for my whole life. Conflict is not pleasant, but it is inescapable. The best course of action is in developing positive ways of handling it that will benefit all those involved.

My tendency to take personal what in most cases are just differences of opinions, makes it more difficult for me to compromise and causes the conflict to escalate unnecessarily. After determining that I had an unhealthy method of handling conflict, I attempted to determine what a healthy one would consist of. So, in determining that conflict is a perceived problem, I realized that handling conflict should be viewed as problem solving. I feel that this is an appropriate and realistic way to handle conflict, and that instead of viewing it as a struggle to be avoided, conflict should be seen as opportunity to work with others to find solutions.

Interpersonal conflict is a part of life. There will always be different people with different needs that conflict with our own. These people are not enemies; they are not trying to take anything away from us, they simply have a need that seemingly conflicts with our own. I say that the ideal coping mechanism for this situation is to learn to problem solve and compromise and walk away from the situation without a conflict.